Chastity Games

One of my kinky friends was delighted to hear I was keeping my slaves chaste. She clapped her hands in a giddy sort of way and grinned like a Cheshire Cat.

"What kind of chastity games do you play?" 

I stared at her blankly. "Games?"

"You know! Do you roll the dice and see how many days he stays locked up? Or do you draw a card? Or put marbles in a bag?"

I almost fainted. Leave My power in the hands of chance? NEVER! Sure it sounds fun but that's not what I use it for.

Chastity is NOT a game... at least,  not to Me. It is NOT to add "spice and fun" to my life. It is a symbol of true ownership. As keyholder, I choose when they get to release. Not the roll of a die or the draw of a card or marble.

Mama taught me "If it's not yours, don't touch it."

Their cocks and orgasms belong to ME, not them. 

"If it's not yours, don't touch it"

^Bacon's cock locked away where it belongs^

How Hard Is It To Wait, Point, and Shoot?

So I spent almost an hour painting my body for pictures, which might I add, is VERY difficult to do in a mirror. It looked cute too, swirly green vines up my arms and across my torso, a big flower over my right breast, curly-cues and leaves... all just very, very pretty. So I put on a flowy rainbow skirt, load up the troops (that would be, my husband and the slave) and walk out back for some fun, hippie-esque nature shots. I got all my poses perfected in the mirror, so I was ready and excited! It was like two fucking degrees outside. We took 45 shots. Not a SINGLE FUCKING ONE was any good. REALLY?? You can't wait until my mouth is closed and my face isn't distorted like I smell dog shit? You didn't notice the seam in the front of my skirt? You didn't SEE the tire in the woods behind me? What the FUCK?!!! WHAT... THE.... FUCK!!!!! HOW HARD IS IT? You look at the screen, if it looks good, you push the button!!! You check your background, your subject, and you make sure no heads are cut off. HOW FUCKING HARD IS IT? Anyone in upstate NY who wants to take pictures of a damn-near naked lady, there is a 6 pack of beer in it for you. Leave me a message. Fuck. End rant.

Made Me A Snazzy BDSM Emblem Necklace

Oooohhh, crafty!

See that? All snazzy? I like it!

You want one, don't you?

Who wouldn't love this?

 A fabulous sight for so many reasons

Every night 

Hmmm

I bet this would make some beautiful welts!

So you're looking for a Domme

Out of all the emails and IM messages I receive, it's rare to find one from someone who has any level of class or tact in their words. I have seen some that are worse than others. They usually break down to the good, the bad, and the pathetic.

The Good:
Good afternoon, Ma'am. My name is (so and so) and I am a (age) year old submissive/kinkster/bottom from (area). I was intrigued by your (profile/blog/pics) and I was hoping you would have the time to chat sometime. I have been interested in the lifestyle for (number of) years and my experience is (activites/experience/etc). I am interested in trying (insert fetish here). I am interested in serving by (insert what you have to offer here). I hope to speak with you.
Closing,
Signature

The Bad: Hello Mistress (cringe) I am looking for a Mistress to punish and humiliate me, can you help?

The Pathetic: Hey BB you're so hot, are you horny? Let's do this.

Um.... "Hey BB let's do this"?
You're kidding, right?
The bad and the pathetic get immediately deleted.

A Domme is not an escort, a phone sex operator, or a webcam girl. I am not your personal wank bank. Questions like "what are you wearing" and "what would you do to me" come off to me as trolling for cybersex and the conversation will immediately be terminated. A profile pic of your genitalia or sexual comments will usually yield very low results.

If you are looking for a Dominant, have some class, and for the love of all things kinky, have some respect! Didn't your mama teach you any manners? Introduce yourself. Dommes demand respect, and you have a much better chance of getting her attention if you are respectful from the very start. Keep in mind, most Dominant females receive over 100 emails a week. Yours needs to stand out from all the others.

Don't be an asskisser. Yes, I demand respect, but I see a red flag go up when someone offers every bit of their life to someone they haven't even met.

Take the time to write out a message. "Txt spk" shorthand is simply unacceptable. It makes you look lazy and to be honest, I have to way too many emails to go through to waste time trying to figure out what the hell you are trying to say.

Do NOT address a Dominant woman as "Mistress" or "Goddess" unless they ask you to. I am not your Mistress (yet) and frankly, it is downright pretentious to think I want to be YOUR Mistress before I have ever even spoken to you. Calling a Domme you don't know "Mistress" is like calling some random woman your wife.

State what you have to offer. Most Dommes are looking for more than just another ass to spank. What makes you different than every other email I get? Why should I work with you as my submissive? Being a Domme is hard work, how will you make it worth my while?

Never assume a Dominant is looking unless they actively say so on their profile or blog.

Do NOT EVER lie about your experience level. Being inexperienced is rarely a problem. Being a liar is ALWAYS a problem.
If you are inexperienced or new to the lifestyle, don't expect a busy Domme to hold your hand and teach you everything there is to know. Do some research. Google is your friend. There are some wonderful resources on the internet that can give you a little bit of a window into the lifestyle and enough information to help you sort out what you are really looking for.  Know what you want before contacting a Dominant. No one wants to spend hours trying to break you out of your shell just to figure out what your interests are. Research, soul search, and then research some more.

Compliments are nice, harassment is not. "I have to say, the pic of you in the red corset is absolutely stunning" will be much more well received than "Your pics are hot, you have amazing tits and ass, I wanna see more of you." The latter is just plain rude.

Last but not least, join your local bdsm group. Yes, your area has them, you just don't know it because we are discreet. A simple web search will yield surprising results. Most if not all fetish groups are very welcoming to newbies and seasoned kinksters alike. Don't be shy. We are very friendly.

The Screamer

I had a play date today with a friend of mine from a couple counties away. He drove a long way to see me, and I wanted to make sure it was worth his while. He is a masochist, or as I say, a pain whore. He like-a da pain, and as a sadist, I like-a da giving of pain.
I should probably start by saying how much I love this man. He was my first kinky friend in the area and from the very beginning was always very sweet and kind to me. I have been wanting to see him for months, and since I quit the group where we met, it was difficult to schedule time with someone who lived so far away. We usually saw each other at munches and other public gatherings, so our interaction is limited to friendly chatting and occasionally, sneaking a nipple twist or a dragging of my nails on his back when no one is looking.
I did have the opportunity to play with him at a private party a few months ago, but I didn't do my best work. I need the private, uninterrupted exchange of energy. Though we both thoroughly enjoyed the scene, I knew that getting him alone was the only way to give him a real taste of the intensity that is Lady Julianna.
So we made a date, which was today, and I was so excited last night I barely slept. Like a kid on Christmas eve, I swear. I was up late and woke up early in time to make myself beautiful and prepare myself for scening, which includes food and caffeine and nicotine and a little meditation. He arrived right on time, just as houseboy was lacing my corset. I wore a gorgeous brocade underbust corset with a black lace bra and a long, flowing lace skirt. Houseboy prepared the dungeon while my friend, my hubby and I chatted upstairs. I was eager to play, but wanted my sub to be comfortable and relaxed in my home. So we chatted and joked and talked about this and that, everyone seemed happy and content, and we headed down to the dungeon.
He doesn't wear cuffs, doesn't even own a pair, and I was surprised to find out that in all his years in the lifestyle, he has never worn a pair of cuffs. Ever. He has manacles... steel manacles for his wrists and ankles and a locking matching collar... and chain. Lots and lots of chains. Fucking HOT! I strung him up and had at him. Double flogging, paddling, whipping, pinching, clamping, nipple torture, cbt, I pulled out all the stops. The cane, the crop, the pinwheel, every toy got used this afternoon. I even made a human harp out of him! Let me tell you, there is something about a screamer. Mmmmm yes he is a SCREAMER! A writhing, squirming, shrieking mass of submissive lust. I could barely hear the sounds of the impact amidst the cries of  "yes! no! oh god no! you evil bitch! I love you! fuck! shit! oh god noooooo!" I was so erotically charged by it, my panties were soaked and wetness was starting to run down my thighs. I worked cautiously and carefully, reading his body and bringing him to the edge of subspace over and over again and gently bringing him back down. Brutal paddlings and whippings sandwiched between sensual stroking, touching and kissing. When I finally got him over the edge, I unchained him and walked him to the couch, snuggling under a blanket to keep away the chills. We idly stroked and touched each other in the afterglow, my bra had long since been removed and tossed aside to combat the sweating that comes with that surge of adrenaline. We spent a good long time loving on each other until I was very comfortable and very satisfied. We snuggled for so long I told him if I got too comfortable I might not be able to get back in "mode"... so back in action I went, spanking and torturing him, even penetrating him and sitting on his face as he writhed in agony on my dungeon floor. I love that... administering that delicious pain and ohhhh the look in his eyes, sheer horror crossed with pure lust and utter adoration. This is what I live for. That look right there. It took him a while to "come down"... he was flying for a long time. I knew I had done my job well.

Chastity and Orgasm Denial

The rule has always been that they don't masturbate unsupervised and without permission. It's in the contract. I have been having a situation with the slave getting a bit of an attitude because he was "hurting" and his "balls ache" from not being able to masturbate and frankly, I am sick of him walking around with an erection all the time. slaves can't think straight when they are thinking with their cocks. Enter the CB-6000. The CB has always been renowned for being the most secure chastity device on the market and the most comfortable for long-term use. Their new model, the 6000, debuted several months ago. I ordered two, one shipped to my sissy maid in the next county over, and one shipped here to my house for my live-in slave. Sissy's arrived first. He looks forward to his chastity, he has always been a fan. I had him locked in a pretty old CB-3000 for several months before the hinge broke and it had to be cut off. We expect no such problems with the new (improved) model. Sissy is all locked up and ready to go, with a tamper-evident tag with a serial number on it. When he comes for a session next week, we will put the permanent lock on it and I will keep the only keys with me. My houseboy, on the other hand, has no idea what's coming for him. I told him I had ordered him something online, and he was to deposit the money in my bank to pay for the item. He did. He is excited. He won't be excited when he finds out that there will no longer be a way to cheat on the "no masturbation" rule. His body, his cock, his orgasms.... they all belong to me. I choose when he is allowed to cum and I choose when he is allowed to touch and I choose when he eats, pees, showers, shits, works, sleeps and plays. When I unlock him for play, when I give him the privilege of cumming, he will then learn to appreciate it. It will enforce his devotion to me and not himself. Plus, not having a choice may make it easier for him than the honor system.

Chastity is an exquisite torture, and it puts me in full control of the most intimate part of my D/s relationships. I can't wait to begin this delicious torture on my subs.

Update 3/15/11 the other CB arrived today, both subs are now officially locked down.

I Am Not Your Mistress!

I get over 100 emails a week. I am on several popular bdsm social networking sites, and the little subbie boys just can't wait to get some domination. I have my yahoo chat active on my blog, and links are posted on social sites. I get a lot of IM's. I find it amusing when someone I have never spoken to addresses me as "Mistress". Um... I am not your Mistress. That's like calling some random person your wife.
"Hello, Mistress. I am looking for a beautiful, strong, confident, powerful woman such as yourself to use and abuse me to your liking. I wish only to please you, Mistress, and I will do anything to make you happy."
"Dear Mistress, I read your blog and I was wondering if you were looking for another miserable slave like myself to join your stable" 
Me: "Unless I have collared you, I prefer you not call me Mistress. Julianna is fine."
Idiot: "Yes, Mistress Julianna. anything to please you"
Me: "I am not your Mistress."
Idiot: "Yes, um, what would you like from a miserable slave such as myself? Anything that pleases you, Ma'am"
Me: "I am into bondage, impact and sensual play, human equine, humiliation, munches, parties and other local events"
Idiot: "I don't like pain and stuff."
Me: "What parts of bdsm interest you?"
Idiot: "I will do anything to please you. I love to eat a woman out for hours and hours until she is satisfied. Your pics make me so horny."
Me: "My D/s relations are for the most part, non-sexual."
Idiot: "Yes, Mistress, I understand it's not all about sex"
Me:  "What are your limits?"
Idiot: "I have no limits"
Me: "Really? Then I can cut slits in your body with a knife and rub shit in them?"
Idiot: "No!!"
Me: "Well? What are your limits?"
Idiot: "Not being allowed to please you. I only want to please you. Can I see some more pics of you?"
Me: "I think you might consider a casual encounters ad or even an escort. I think you are getting "Domme" confused with "fucktoy". It seems like that would be more what you are looking for. I am a real Domme. Not a showgirl."
Idiot:  "I am a bad boy, Mistress, and I need to be punished."
Me: "You don't like pain, and don't call me Mistress. Julianna, or even Ma'am is just fine."
Idiot: "Punish me by making me service you orally, Mistress. Make me your pussy-eating slave"
Me: "Dude. I. Am. Not. Your. Mistress. I will not have sex with you. I will no longer talk with you. By the power vested in me, I now pronounce you deleted and blocked. You may now kiss my ass."

A Note From a Submissive

Here I have posted a note written to me by a wonderful submissive friend of mine after we scened together at a play party. I had joked to him that I wondered who was in more pain, him or me. This was his reply.

My dear Julianna-I certainly hope I am the only one in pain. I would be mortified if our session caused you anything but enjoyment. If that is the case please accept my apologies. I have honestly been enjoying the many "gifts" you gave me Saturday night. If I could have remembered the quote about the check I just wrote that I would never cash or something like that, I would have posted it. All I know is that when you said it I got chills and knew that I had gone too far. You rightly taught me a lesson. That incident increased my respect for you so much. Your skills as a top and a sadist are worthy of great respect and it truly was a privilege to bottom for you. It was wonderful hanging there, looking deep into your eyes, not knowing if I was going to be kissed, beaten, rubbed, or bit; yet knowing that whatever was coming would be exactly what I needed. Your aftercare was great, you took such good care of me. Your attention is a gift beyond compare. Your friendship is a treasure! I so look forward to partnering with you again. and again and again.

The Dungeon of the Frugal Dominant

So I have been steadily building a basement dungeon and let me tell you something, that dungeon furniture costs a pretty penny. Uh-uh. No way. Not in this lifetime will I spend that much money on items of this nature. Enter my creative side. I conjure up ideas and lucky for me, I have handy-dandy slaves to build that shit for me. Eyebolts in the rafters. Check. Upright pillories (aka stocks) (made for me by my sissy slave). Check. Bondage platform with 10 eyebolts for delightful torture (made for me by one of my subs). Check. Worship throne. Check (for now, an antique rocking chair). Spanking bench (made for me by my sissy slave). Check. Dog cage. Check (picked it up used for like 50 bucks).
When building your first playspace, be resourceful.  An old weight lifting bench can be used for a massage table, a ladder back chair makes a wonderful bondage chair, and anything can be used for impact, such as wooden dowels, frat paddles, ping pong paddles, i even made a whip out of telephone wires once! Clothespins. Chopsticks. Wooden spoons. Think outside the box. Pervertize your home. I guarantee you have plenty of items to "play" with. I have composed a list for anyone curious about building their own dungeon. Enjoy.

The Essentials:

A spanking bench of some kind
Impact toys.
Lots of rope.
Eyebolts in the ceiling.
Chains
Caribeners
A throne or other impressive chair to sit and be worshiped.
Kneeling mats.
Cuffs, collars, etc.
A blindfold

Nice to Have:
A St Andrews Cross (i don't like them because you can only access one side of the body at a time, but they look cool)
A red light bulb (trust me).
Scene music (i can make recommendations if needed, or see my playlist at the bottom of the blog).
A massage table
Stocks
A camera
A smothering box
A queening chair
A bondage rack (an old ladder works well)
A St Catherine's Wheel (I WANT ONE!)

Toys:
Single tail whip
multi tail whip
floggers of all kinds
paddles
feather ticklers
cock and ball parachute and weights
nipple clamps and weights
lots of clothespins and a clothespin zipper
rattan canes or fiberglass canes
Whartenberg Wheel
Scraps of velvet, felt and fur for sensation play and for smoothing over fresh welts.
A squirt bottle of ICE COLD water (be creative with it) 
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