Today celebrates the one year anniversary that I have been Lady Julianna's sissy maid. I can't tell you what that means to me. She is a wonderful, caring, and loving Mistress, and I have learned so much from her. She has opened up a whole new world to me, with experiences that I never thought I would have. We made it thru all the ups and downs, good times and bad, and my love and devotion for her grows every single day.
She keeps me in chastity 24/7, and even though it is very difficult and frustrating at times, I wouldn't have it any other way. Feeling her cage locked on me every day helps me remember how much she loves and cherishes me. When I serve her, and see the key to my freedom hanging on her necklace, it only re-enforces those feelings.
We can't be together as often as we both would like, but I wouldn't trade the time I have with her for anything in the world. Whether I am dressed in my formal uniform, serving tea to her and a friend, cleaning her house, doing her laundry, or she has me bound naked and helpless, enjoying herself paddling my "spank-able" ass, there is no where I would rather be.
I am looking forward to many more years of service to this wonderful Domme. She brightens my day, and fills my heart with a joy that I can't even describe. We fit together so well, it is sometimes scary...like cookies and milk, ying and yang, cock lock and key.
I love you so very, very much, Mistress. You own me, heart and soul, and I can't imagine how my "sissy life" would be without you.
Happy anniversary, my wonderful Mistress. You have made me one very happy sissy.
contributed by cdangela
Saturday, November 12, 2011
Wednesday, November 2, 2011
Etiquette for Public Play
When talking with friends about some of the play parties they have been to, I always hear the stories of "that one guy who...." broke every etiquette rule in the book and made people unhappy or uncomfortable. There is no real general "rulebook" to play parties, though some dungeons do have a list of rules for attendees, but basic etiquette applies. Always. I found this wonderful article on play party etiquette and thought it was a wealth of information for those who may not be familiar with what is and is not considered acceptable behavior. It's easy to feel very comfortable very fast, especially with a group of friendly, welcoming kinksters. Being comfortable shouldn't mean forgetting your manners. Etiquette For Public Play Written by laynie Posted with permission from my friends at bdsmcircle Having been in this lifestyle for 6 years and having had the opportunity to play as well as DM at various public and private events. It always amazes me how many people do not know how to behave in public. I am not just talking about newbies. I mean experienced Dominants and submissives. One would think that before one goes out to play, whether to a public club or a private play party, that one would take the time to educate themselves on proper public etiquette. Since this is often not the case I have decided to do some research and compile a list of rules for public behavior. Do not touch people, even in what you think of as a friendly way (like touching someone's arm in conversation) without asking permission. In some circles, hugging even strangers hello and goodbye seems to be the norm. In most BDSM circles I know of, hugging someone in even a casual way without verbal consent is considered overstepping the boundaries Because someone is standing naked next to you does not make it ok to stroke the person's ass---in fact, it is not ok to stroke even the person's arm! Assume that any touch is not ok without asking first. On the other hand, asking to hug or shake hands is certainly acceptable and not considered an offense in any way. Do not interfere with scenes in progress. Do not crowd a scene by watching or playing too close. Leave space for the top to move, swing a flogger, etc. If the Top asks you to move then move. If the room is too crowded then leave and come back when the crowd thins out. Be quiet while scenes are going on, or go to the social space to chat! The comments you think are whispered quietly to the person next to you is often heard by the Top or bottom Be polite, and don't talk or whisper. Yours could be the remark that ruins a wonderful scene for someone. Attempting to start conversations with the top or the bottom during scenes is one of the most common and astonishing etiquette errors at play parties. It should be obvious,but just in case it is not I will say it loud and clear: Do not address comments or questions to the top or the bottom while they are playing! As well do not try to start a conversation with the partners while they are cuddling together after a scene. If the Top steps away to get a new toy or the couple are talking intimately after the scene is not the time to walk over and chat. Do not ever touch or get too close to the bottom during---or after---a scene. After a scene, give the players a quiet space on the sofa if they want to cuddle together. Give people time to come down. If you need to ask a quiet question, like "Would you like this blanket that's here behind me?," address the top, not the bottom, and be as unobtrusive and quiet as possible. Do not join in scenes, even if it looks like they are free-for-alls. Join in only if the top clearly beckons you in. If in doubt, check with the top. Do not come on to whoever you are sexually interested in in a clueless manner. Hounding, harassing, or puppy-dogging after the object of your sexual interest will guarantee that you will not be invited to any more parties and might even get you kicked out. Most people like to be complimented on their scenes. Telling them what you liked about their scene is usually well-received. But wait till they are walking about and socializing again! Asking interesting how-to questions is also a good way to make friends. Do not intervene in scenes. If you are bothered by something you see find a host or DM to check on the scene, explain it to you, or reassure you. If a corrective action needs to be taken, the host or DM will take care of conveying that to the top in an appropriate manner. If something is too extreme for you to enjoy watching, then simply leave the room quietly. Do not touch people's toys, floggers, etc. that are lying around without finding the owner and asking. . Do not run a knife or wartenburg pinwheel along your skin to test its sharpness---the owner might have gone to pains to sterilize the blade in expectation of an upcoming scene, and sharp edges break skin without always leaving marks or drawing blood. Clean up play furniture or play areas when you are done using them. Pick up your toys so someone else can use the play area Wipe down the play furniture so it is not sweaty for the next person, and if any bodily fluids were spilled accidentally, clean them up thoroughly---hosts often provide appropriate cleaning materials if you don't have them on hand. Do not hog play furniture for hours on end with your own scene. If play furniture and play space are scarce, ask the host for an estimate of a reasonable amount of time to use it. Be tolerant of things you didn't expect. Even if you are fascinated, try not to gawk noticeably at stuff you personally have never encountered before. Watching and learning are fine. If you are shocked by the amount of blood flow from a ritual cutting, or if you never expected to see a someone’s nipple pierced with a needle, or anything else that seems extreme to you, then the astonishment is probably yours. Get a grip. Read a few books (or websites) on BDSM. You might even pick up some fine points of etiquette, like how to behave toward a slave in the presence of the master, such as never treat a slave as if they are a slave to you! No one besides your own partner owes any deference to you beyond common, everyday courtesy. No one is required to fetch you a drink or defer to your opinion in conversation. And addressing a stranger you are chatting with as `Mistress' or `Sir' just because the person is or appears to be a Dom/me is considered bad form in many play circles. People in the scene usually introduce themselves and address each other by their ordinary names or nicknames. I am sure that there are many more rules of etiquette out there. I think these are pretty basic and should give you a good start on public . In addition to the article posted above, I would like to add: Please never, EVER break out a camera or camera cell phone at a play party. Most dungeons and play party hosts have a "no photography" rule as it is, but it is basic etiquette to not take photos unless it is expressed otherwise. There are too many people in the background who may not want their face "out there" in the world, and the hosts may not want their home in the background of pics. If you would like photos in the dungeon, check with the host about the possibility of stopping by early for a quick photo shoot, or staying late for the same. | |||||||||||
A Definition of Submission
A Definition of Submission
Author Unknown
Submission is not about suffering . . .
. . . Submission is about service.
Submission is not about humiliation . . .
. . . Submission is about humility.
Submission is not about pain . . .
. . . Submission is about being present.
Submission is not about being used . . .
. . . Submission is about being of use.
Submission is not about control . . .
. . . Submission is about letting go.
Submission is not about what is done to you .
. . . Submission is about what you do for others.
Submission is not about abuse . . .
. . . Submission is about acceptance.
Submission is not about proving anything . . .
. . . Submission is about being real.
Submission is not about contempt . . .
. . . Submission is about respect.
Submission is not about how you look . . .
. . . Submission is about how much you care.
Submission is not about denying yourself . . .
. . . Submission is about being open.
Submission is not about bondage . . .
. . . Submission is about freeing your spirit.
Submission is not about punishment . . .
. . . Submission is about discipline.
Submission is not about being unable to escape . . .
. . . Submission is about being committed.
Submission is not about submission . . .
. . . Submission is about obedience.
Submission is not about fear . . .
. . . Submission is about trust.
Submission is not about sex . . .
. . . Submission is about love.
Submission is not about pleasure . . .
. . . Submission is about happiness
Thursday, October 27, 2011
Just Some Casual Fun
Tied up a sweet footstool today...
but then I got bored,
so I flipped it over....
And turned it into a little tea table!!
Good times!!
Monday, October 24, 2011
Wrist and Ankle Bondage Restraints Tutorial
Don't forget to take my polls on the right side of this page! On with the tutorial!
I have made this photo tutorial by request from a fellow kinkster, and thought I would share it for anyone who wants to learn a simple, effective and safe rope restraint to use with their partner.
I have made this photo tutorial by request from a fellow kinkster, and thought I would share it for anyone who wants to learn a simple, effective and safe rope restraint to use with their partner.
Make a "lark's head" knot over the ankle or wrist, as shown.
Pull on the loop, in order to get some slack, and wrap the loop and the extra slack around the limb. The ropes from the loop should be on the outside, and the long ends on the inside.
Wrap the loop around again. You may have to help the ropes move around the wrist or ankle. You should now have 6 ropes around the limb. They should be comfortable and snug but not tight. If you can't easily slip a finger between the ropes and the limb, they are TOO TIGHT.
You can now choose to do a 4th wrap (making 8 ropes around the limb) if you like. Remember the wider the restraint it, the more surface area is covers, spreading out the pressure and the less discomfort it causes. I like to use 3 on a wrist and 4 on an ankle.
For this tutorial, I just used 3.
Take one of the long ends and pass it under HALF of the wraps, starting at the outside and pulling it out through the middle.
For this tutorial, I just used 3.
Take one of the long ends and pass it under HALF of the wraps, starting at the outside and pulling it out through the middle.
Repeat on the other side. Your restraint should now look like this.
Repeat on both sides, so you now have double looped the ends around the ropes. This "locks" the restraint in place, so no matter how much your partner wiggles, the ropes will NOT tighten on them and cut off circulation.
This is how it should look when finished!
This is how it should look when finished!
Remember bondage always looks and feels nicer when the ropes are smooth and even.
Now take those loose ends and tie them to a bedpost or to each other or whatever you want. HAVE FUN! PLAY SAFE! Don't forget your safety shears!
Now take those loose ends and tie them to a bedpost or to each other or whatever you want. HAVE FUN! PLAY SAFE! Don't forget your safety shears!
Poll Time
I am a curious Lady. I like to know things. This blog site tells me where in the world my views come from, and how many a day, but it does not tell me who you are. You know all about me, now I want to know about you. Please take a moment and answer the three questions over there on the right ----->
Poll closes in a week, and I will add new polls as the desire strikes me. Ok, fine I admit, I just found the poll feature on here and I want to play with it. Humor me, won't you?
Poll closes in a week, and I will add new polls as the desire strikes me. Ok, fine I admit, I just found the poll feature on here and I want to play with it. Humor me, won't you?
Monday, September 19, 2011
Psychology Today Article About Sadism/Masochism
Good morning, dear Readers,
I came upon this very informative article in Psychology Today that seems to answer the most common question asked by the vanilla, the curious and the new.... "Why?".
I came upon this very informative article in Psychology Today that seems to answer the most common question asked by the vanilla, the curious and the new.... "Why?".
The Pleasure of the Pain: Why some people need S&M
Bind my ankles with your white cotton rope so I cannot walk. Bind my wrists so I cannot push you away. Place me on the bed and wrap your rope tighter around my skin so it grips my flesh. Now I know that struggle is useless, that I must lie here and submit to your mouth and tongue and teeth, your hands and words and whims. I exist only as your object. Exposed.
Of every 10 people who read these words, one or more has experimented with sadomasochism (S&M), which is most popular among educated, middle-and-upper-middle-class men and women, according to psychologists and ethnographers who have studied the phenomenon. Charles Moser, Ph.D., M.D., of the institute for Advanced Study of Human Sexuality in San Francisco, has researched S&M to learn the motivation behind it--to understand why in the world people would ask to be bound, whipped and flogged. The reasons are as surprising as they are varied.
For Mark, the desire became apparent when he was a child playing war games-he always hoped to be captured. "I was frightened that I was sick," he says. But now, he adds, as a well-seasoned player on the scene, "I thank the leather gods I found this community."
At first the scene found him. When he was at a party in college a professor chose him. She brought him home and tied him up, telling him how bad he was for having these desires, even as she fulfilled them. For the first time he felt what he had only imagined, what he had read about in every S&M book he could find.
Mark, a father and manager, has a Type A personality--in-control, hard-working, intelligent, and demanding. His intensity is evident on his face, in his posture, in his voice. But when he plays, his eyes drift and a peaceful energy flows through him as though he had injected heroin. With each addition of pain or restraint, he stiffens slightly, then falls into a deeper calm, a deeper peace, waiting to obey his mistress. "Some people have to be tied up to be
free," he says.
As Mark's experience illustrates, sadomasochism involves a uniquely skewed power relationship established through role-playing, bondage, and/or the infliction of pain. In the sub-category known as Domination and Submission, or D&S, the essential component is not the pain or bondage itself, but rather the knowledge that one person has complete control over the other, deciding what that person will hear, do, taste, touch, smell and feel. We hear about men pretending to be little girls, women being bound in leather straps, people screaming in pain and ecstasy with each strike of a flogger or drip of hot wax. We hear about it because it is happening in bedrooms and dungeons across the country.
For over a century, people who engaged in bondage, beatings and humiliation for sexual pleasure were considered mentally ill. But in the 1980s, the American Psychiatric Association removed S&M as a category in its Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders. This decision--like the decision to remove homosexuality as a category in 1973--was a big step toward the societal acceptance of people whose sexual desires aren't traditional, or vanilla, as it's called in S&M circles.
What's new is that such desires are increasingly being considered normal, even healthy, as experts begin to recognize their psychological value. S&M, they are beginning to understand, offers a release of sexual and emotional energy that people cannot get from traditional sex.
"The satisfaction gained from S&M is something far more than sex," explains Roy Baumeister, Ph.D., a social psychologist at Case Western Reserve University "It can be a total emotional release." Although people report that they have better-than-usual sex immediately after a scene, the goal of S & M itself is not intercourse: "A good scene doesn't end in orgasm, it ends in catharsis."
Escaping the Modern Western Ego
"Sadomasochism is a way people can forget themselves." Roy Baumeister, Ph.D., Professor of psychology, Case Western Reserve University.
"Nothing matters except you, me and the sound of my voice," Lily Fine, a professional dominatrix, tells the tied-up and exposed businessman who begged to be spanked before breakfast. She says it slowly, making her slave wait for every sound, forcing him to focus only on her, to float in anticipation of the sensations she will create inside him. Anxieties about mortgages and taxes, stresses about business partners and job deadlines are vanquished each time the flogger hits the flesh. The businessman is reduced to a physical creature existing only in the here and now, feeling the pain and pleasure. "I'm interested in manipulating what's in the mind," Lily says. "The brain is the greatest erogenous zone."
In another S&M 'scene,' Lily tells a woman to take off her clothes, then dresses her only with a blindfold. She commands the woman not to move. Lily then takes a tissue and begins moving it over the woman's body in different patterns and at varying speeds and angles. Sometimes she lets the edge of the tissue just barely brush the woman's stomach and breasts; sometimes she bunches the tissue and creates swirls on her back and all the way down. "The woman was quivering. She didn't know what I was doing to her, but she was liking it," Lily remembers with a smile.
Escape theory is further supported by an idea called "frame analysis," developed by the late Irving Goffman, Ph.D. According to Goffman, despite its popular conception as darkly wild and orgiastic, S&M play has complex rules, rituals, roles and dynamics that create a "frame" around the experience. "Frames are like fantasies--they suspend reality. They create expectations, norms and values that set this situation apart from other parts of life," confirms Thomas Weinberg, Ph.D., a sociologist at Buffalo State College in New York and the editor of S&M: Studies in Dominance & Submission (Prometheus Books, 1995). Once inside the frame, people are free to act and feel in ways they couldn't at other times.
S&M: Part of the Sexual Continuum
S&M has inspired the creation of many psychological theories in addition to the ones discussed here. Do we need so many? Perhaps not according to Stephanie Saunders Ph.D., associate director of the Kinsey Institute for Research in Sex, Gender and Reproduction at Indiana University, "a lot of behaviors that are scrutinized because they are seen to be marginal are really a part of the continuum of sexuality and sexual behavior." After all, the ingredients in good S&M play-communication, respect and trust-are the same ingredients in good traditional sex. The outcome is the same, too-a feeling of connection to the body and the self.
Monday, September 12, 2011
Looking to Be a Live-In Submissive
I can't tell you the countless emails I get from men asking for a live-in situation. Are they stupid? Do they think I am stupid? Can you imagine? "Yes, I like your profile, you can move in right away." Not in this lifetime!!!
Choosing a submissive for a live-in situation, or for any situation, is a serious undertaking. This is your HOME we are talking about. A submissive looking for a brief session has to go through a meeting process, and interview and inspection process AND provide references before they can even come to my playspace for an hour! What in the HELL makes these people think that by calling me cute names like "Goddess" and promising eternal slavery is going to make me let them move in with me?!
A live-in submissive needs to be someone you KNOW, and someone who is well known in the bdsm community. My subs who are looking for a live-in situation need to be friends (and I mean active friends) with me for at LEAST a year, and then 6 solid months of training on top of that. They have to come for short visits, then weekend visits, then long (1-2 week) visits before they can even be considered for a live-in relationship.
I don't care if you lost your job. I don't care if you live with your parents. I don't care if you are getting evicted next week. I don't care if your Mistress from 8 years ago who lives 500 miles away can provide me with a killer reference. I don't know you. You aren't coming to my house. Are you seriously that arrogant that you think you can send me two flirtatious messages and I am going to move you right in? Get over yourself.
Reunited
After a long several months of not having my sissy maid to serve Me, she has finally returned home where she belongs. It was a joyous reunion, complete with tears, and she finally got to wear the beautiful Italian silk uniform that I had chosen for her that has been hanging in my closet for over 6 weeks.
She arrived on time and bestowed upon me some lovely gifts, and soon after we proceeded to the playspace. I collared her, and presented her with her new italian silk uniform and matching shoes.
Sissy and I took our time together. Hell it took almost an hour just to lace her into her new uniform for the first time.
We didn't care about service, we didn't care about play. All we cared about was that we were FINALLY together again. I relished in making her beautiful, after carefully applying her makeup and dressing her, we spent some time just being together; laughing and hugging and being silly. Isn't she beautiful?
 |
| She loves me. |
It didn't take long before I wanted to warm up the ol' impact toys. Her ass is just too spankable to not give any attention to. It had been months since she has felt the sting of my paddle, and I could tell her pain tolerance had gone way down... but it needed to be done. She needed to think of me every time she sat down.
To satisfy her need to serve, she folded several baskets of laundry, but service wasn't on my mind. We just wanted to be near each other. Sometimes, when a Domme and a sub are as emotionally connected as we are, being together is all that matters.
My sissy's thoughts on coming home:
Reunion with my Mistress.
For those that are faithful readers of this blog, you know that I was working out of town for the summer, and wasn't able to serve my Mistress for almost five long months. We did see each other over that time, but they were only short visits, with no sissy time. I can't even tell you how difficult that was for us both. She was also understanding enough to release me from my chastity cage, so it wouldn't interfere with the physical labor required for my job. I locked it on when I could, but it's just not the same. We did keep in constant communication, so it wasn't as bad as it could have been.
We did do some "sissy shopping", as Mistress likes to call it, so that helped too. She picked out a beautiful new maid uniform for me, shoes and all, and it was pure torture waiting the last month to wear it for her.
Finally, the day was here that we were reuinited properly. We chatted for a little while, kind of letting the anticipation we both felt build a little more. Then, it was time to dress in my new uniform...
The first thing she did, was put my collar on, and replace the cheap little lock on my CB with Her lock...the one I have no keys for. Hearing the click of that lock was soothing, and it felt so wonderful to be under her control again.
Mistress did my makeup for me (she is awesome at it) so I would look as good as possible, and then directed me to put on my black fishnet stockings. Then it was time to dress.
We both just stood there for a moment, admiring my new uniform on the hanger. It is absolutely beautiful! Custom made for me from Italian silk, it has a corset type lace up bodice and back, with pretty white bows at the short sleeves, full black petticoat, matching lace trimmed panties, lacy headband, and two different aprons...one full style, and a shorter waist apron. I was so excited just looking at it.
Mistress Julianna wanted the pleasure of dressing me in it for the first time. I can't even describe how I felt when she started dressing me. As she pulled it over my head and into place, and started adjusting the back lacing, all of these emotions washed over me. I was back with my Mistress after so long, and she was dressing me in a beautiful new uniform to serve her. I couldn't help it, I started to tear up a little. She saw this, smiled her beautiful smile at me, and "warned" me not to mess up my make-up. I told her I would do my best, but felt like I was going to start blubbering any minute! I was just so happy.
She kissed me on the cheek, and went back to dressing me. When the dress was to her satisfaction, she handed me the panties and petticoat to step into. With those in place, she put the full apron on me, adjusting the straps, and tieing a beautiful big bow in back. She said she loved the way the bow sat right at the top of my butt. She gave me my new shoes, and watched intently as I put them on and buckled the ankle straps. Kneeling before her, she put the final peice on...the beautiful headband. Putting her hand on my chin, she raised my head and looked into my eyes and said "You look absolutely wonderful sissy".
Having me stand, she just stood there and looked at me for a few minutes, smiling her wonderful, devious smile all the time. After a whole bunch of pictures, it was finally playtime for Mistress. I won't go into a lot of detail, as those sessions are very private for us, but let's just say she LOVES spanking me, and she hadn't for 5 months...you do the math...LOL
I spent the rest of our time together enjoying being back with my wonderful Mistress, whom I missed so much over the summer. I brought her drinks, and anything else she wanted, and spent some time folding laundry for her. I was in sissy heaven. I was with my Mistress, serving her as a sissy maid should, trying to make her life easier. It was all I could do to not spend the whole day blubbering tears of sissy joy, but I made it.
Tuesday, September 6, 2011
The Best Shopping Season Ever!
Well, my kinky friends, my favorite shopping season has come. No I don't mean Black Friday. Not Holiday Clearance time either. I am talking about HALLOWEEN!!!
This is the PERFECT time to stock up on all your kinky shoes, costumes and accessories! Every year around this time I buy out all the fishnet stockings at $3 a pair. I love to hit those Halloween shops for some of the coolest sexy outfits, gloves, fishnet tops, wigs, gothic jewelry and everything in between.
I hope to find my Dirty Doctor costume this year! Ohhh how wonderful to tie you to a table and give you a naughty "exam"! Scared? You should be!
One tip though, don't depend on Halloween shops for your equipment. Costume whips and floggers are exactly that, for COSTUMES. Don't be cheap when it comes to your tools.
Been missing my kinky content? Sissy comes home this week! Be on the lookout for new content and photos!!
This is the PERFECT time to stock up on all your kinky shoes, costumes and accessories! Every year around this time I buy out all the fishnet stockings at $3 a pair. I love to hit those Halloween shops for some of the coolest sexy outfits, gloves, fishnet tops, wigs, gothic jewelry and everything in between.
I hope to find my Dirty Doctor costume this year! Ohhh how wonderful to tie you to a table and give you a naughty "exam"! Scared? You should be!
One tip though, don't depend on Halloween shops for your equipment. Costume whips and floggers are exactly that, for COSTUMES. Don't be cheap when it comes to your tools.
Been missing my kinky content? Sissy comes home this week! Be on the lookout for new content and photos!!
Saturday, September 3, 2011
Titles
It seems so often in the lifestyle that people feel the need to have an impressive title to be accepted. This is definitely not the case. Jumping into the lifestyle for your first time with a grand title like Master, Mistress, even Lady is not only deceiving, but it is a downright lie. These are titles that need to be earned through your actions, experience and acceptance in the BDSM community.
The word MASTER indicates a level of expertise. If you are new to the lifestyle, you certainly are not a Master. A Dominant is a person with a dominant aspect in their personality, be it sexual or otherwise. A Master is a Dominant with significant real life BDSM experience.
Same goes with MISTRESS, though by definition is not the same, it gives the same idea to other lifestylers. A Mistress or Lady is a Dominant female (or Domme) with significant real life BDSM experience.
If you have chosen your title to make your orientation known, Sir or Dom is recommended for males, and Domme or Ms is recommended for females. Dont try to be something you are not. You wont get any respect that way.
"The Master/Mistress is beyond the last level of the Dominant. They are generally well experienced, often having LIVED as a full time slave for up to several years as part of their training. Yes, training. This title USED TO BE given within the local communities in a ceremonial way when the individual had earned this title by the estimation of a majority consensus agreement of the Dominants within that local community. It was considered to be a high honor and carried with it a measure of respect by all those so encountering it."*
With BDSM slowly becoming more and more a trendy, mainstream thing, true lifestylers are constantly struggling to maintain the importance of the words Master and Mistress. If we do not maintain the protocol, the lifestyle is just going to become a joke.
*quoted from http://www.angelfire.com/md2/domsub/domaster.html
Thursday, September 1, 2011
Nominated
Good afternoon, dear readers!
Something pretty cool has come my way.
I have been nominated for the Bloggers Choice Awards under the category of Freakiest Blogger! (who, me?)
I am thoroughly delighted and honored to have been nominated for this award and it would please me so much if you would vote for me.
Please vote for me HERE!
You have to create an account (sorry, at least it is quick though) but luckily they do not spam you or anything like that.
Looking forward to watching the vote tally go up!
Thank you so much to xfaeriedustx for nominating me, thank you to everyone who votes for me, and thank you all for reading The Lady Commands !
Thursday, August 25, 2011
Celebrating the End of Summer
As the summer season draws to a close, I look forward to getting back into the scene. It has been a long few months, and its time to dust off the paddles and bruise some asses. My gift to myself for surviving a kink free summer is a gorgeous new vinyl skirt! I have been pining for it for months and i on sale!! It's finally on sale!!! This is the stock photo from hipsandcurves. I cannot wait for it to arrive! Thankfully, they ship pretty fast, and I will be plastered to the front window waiting for the mailman for the next 3-5 days.
We will be doing a huge photo shoot to celebrate summer ending and my return to the scene!!!
We will be doing a huge photo shoot to celebrate summer ending and my return to the scene!!!
I believe I will make a smashing grand entrance!!!!
Stay tuned!
Wednesday, August 17, 2011
"Stuck" on Needle Play
Even as a Dominant, we all have limits. For as long as I have been in the lifestyle, needles were a limit. Blood is a limit. Not just a limit, but a big fat "OH HELL NO!"
I never really thought about why I was so uncomfortable with the idea of drawing blood, and in talking with my beloved Terry, I realized it's ACCIDENTAL blood that freaks me out. If you weren't expecting it, if it wasn't SUPPOSED to happen, like when I accidentally split my former slave's ballsack open like a butterfly shrimp! That constitutes a mild emergency and a screeching halt to playtime. Who wants that? I would have to say no one.
Enter my new friend. We had dinner at his home with his two beautiful slave girls last night. After the girls served us a lovely dinner in their panties and aprons, we all retired to the living room for some coffee and conversation, where the topic of needles came up.
Our lovely host was kind enough to give me an in depth lesson on needle play and safety, and handed me a tray full of needles to use on my Terry.
Oh what FUN!!!
As a sadist, I loved this, as the more you use the same needle (on the same person of course) the duller the needle becomes and in turn, the more pain it inflicts.
As an artist, I adored this. The different gauges of needle each have a different colored hub. Oh the designs and patterns I can make! I am already envisioning my initial in script done in needles.
Terry got a wonderful buzz from the needle play, and had to lay face down for some time before he was able to sit up so we could go. He didn't stop smiling until he went to bed, and he was probably still smiling then!
I am so thankful to my new friends for teaching me a fun, artistic, and sadistic new fetish. Can't wait to play with needles again!!!
Thursday, August 4, 2011
Saturday, July 30, 2011
A New Uniform for Sissy
Custom made Italian silk! This will look sooo sexy on her!! What a wonderful treat for when she comes home to me :)
Got this at thedommestore.com. Check it out! http://ladyjulianna.blogspot.com/p/shop.html
Got this at thedommestore.com. Check it out! http://ladyjulianna.blogspot.com/p/shop.html
Friday, July 29, 2011
Missing Sissy
It is hard to believe I haven't seen her in months. I have seen my friend, the man who plays her role, but nothing of her beauty. No long legs in silky stockings. No ruffles. No collar, no chains. No yards and yards of rope. Seeing him used to help. At least we could hang out even if I didn't get to dress him up. I love him too, you know... but it was all very strange... it wasn't right. Those man clothes, the short hair, the sneakers.... It is beginning to make me feel unsettled. Sad. Sometimes he would wear panties under his work jeans, perhaps to remind himself what he was, or perhaps he did it for me. Except that one time... when I peeked down the back of his jeans and saw (gulp) men's underwear. I couldn't speak for several minutes. I am a reasonable woman. I wasn't mad per se but it kinda felt shitty inside. I understand about work, and about the guys, and discretion, and I certainly would never expect him to risk accidentally outing himself but damn it! That was some horrifying shit to see! That was NOT my sissy. He still speaks to me the same. Respectfully. Submissively. He still made me a nice pot of sissy balls and sauce. He loves the shit outta me and god knows I love him too, but.... it seems like the amount of love and adoration I have for My sissy is part of what makes me the Dominant that I am. I have evolved so much in my journey during the course of my relationship with her, and when I don't have her, I don't feel like me. Another month and my beautiful sissy will be back.. and so will I. Completely. Summer needs to end NOW!
Stay tuned... kinky session planned with Terry, aka The Screamer.
Tuesday, June 28, 2011
Sunday, June 19, 2011
BDSM Play and Scenario Ideas
Here are some fun playtime ideas that aren't too intense for a beginner but still exciting enough for more seasoned kinksters. These lovely tidbits have been collected from various sites and submitted by friends, and put nice and neat all in one place for you. You're welcome.
Sensation play
You probably use sensation play in your regular sexual activities and don't even realize it. How many times have you had her leave her stockings on, simply because you love the way they feel? Or stroked his cock with your silky panties?
You can use sensation play in D/s scenes too! Start by blindfolding your partner (and tying him or her down, if you like), then subjecting him or her to a wide variety of different sensations. For example, you may stroke your lover's body with ice, or drip hot wax on his or her body, or caress your lover's skin with soft fur, silk scarves, felt, feathers, coarse sandpaper (but gently!), anything with texture.
Human Sex Doll
This is a good way to explore your partner and dabble in D/s. The idea is simple: the submissive partner is a living sex toy, and allows the dominant to put him or her into any position and do anything they want. The submissive partner simply remains in whatever position the dominant places him or her into, and does not take an active role as the dominant explores the submissive. Pay attention to the reactions as you explore. This is a great way to really learn your partner's body and see what makes them tick.
A similar scenario to this is :
The Prize
In this scenario, the submissive is a dancer at an "anything goes" nightclub. As a special promotion, the club has sponsored a drawing; the winner of the drawing gets full and complete use of the stripper for an evening, and the stripper must allow the winner to do whatever he or she wants. The winner takes full advantage of the prize, using the stripper as a sex toy; the stripper must be completely obedient and allow the winner to do whatever the winner wishes, regardless of how the stripper feels about it.
Choose Your Adventure
This is a fun and devious technique that can make use of any of the other ideas here, and anything else you can think of. Make a list, without showing it to your partner, of questions that can be answered with "yes" or "no" or with multiple choice answers. Then ask your partner to answer each question, without telling your partner what the questions are. For example, you might write down a list of questions such as "Will you be tied down?", "Will you be allowed to reach orgasm?", "Will I penetrate you anally, orally, or vaginally?", "Will you be spanked?", or whatever else strikes your fancy.
Don't let your partner see the list. Ask your partner, "Choose 1, 2, or 3," and "Choose yes or no." Write down your partner's answers, then do to your partner whatever their answers indicate. If your partner complains, you can always say "Hey, this is what you chose!"
Orgasm Denial
This is a fun, and frustrating, technique that can bring some of the spark back into sex. There are a hundred variations, but the basic idea is simple: prevent your partner from having an orgasm for a length of time (a day, two days, a week, whatever you want). You can, for example, require that your partner have sex one or more times a day, or masturbate regularly (maybe roll a pair of dice to see how many times they have to "edge" each day) but your partner is not allowed any sexual release. Over time, the sexual tension builds up, and your partner becomes perpetually aroused.
When done over a period of several days or longer, this technique creates a very powerful level of sexual excitement. When you do finally allow your partner release, it's an extremely intense experience. Some of my subs have described it as "their minds leaving their bodies".
Home Invasion (roleplay for men to use on women)
Call your girl. Tell her you've heard that there are burglars in her neighborhood. They tie these women up, ransack their bedrooms, then have their way with their helpless victims. Talk in a sexy voice... to build anticipation and of course, because you don't want to scare the shit out of her. Wait long enough that she totally expecting it and obviously, you go over to her place wearing a burglar costume: Black shirt, black pants, leather gloves, a mask of some kind. Open the door. Tiptoe around until you find your lady, hopefully dressed to please you. You could play "chloroform" her by holding a handkerchief soaked in cheap cologne lightly over her nose and mouth for a few seconds; Or, she could obligingly faint at the very sight of you. Or you can simply seize her in your strong, manly arms. The result is the same: She gets bound and gagged in her bedroom, where she must sit / lie helplessly while you go through her dresser drawers, take her costume jewelry, rummage in her purse, and generally violate her space. Then you can violate her. After you've taken everything of value, you leave her tied up and go. (NOTE! Do NOT go out any doors that lock, period! Do NOT leave the house!!! ) Wait a few minutes. Put on a different shirt, and take off the mask. Then go back into the bedroom with "OMG! What happened!!" Untie her, take her in your arms, comfort her an any way she may desire. See how many fun ways she can show her gratitude for being rescued.
DON'T FORGET YOUR SAFE WORDS!
Dirty Doctor (roleplay)
This is a favorite of mine that can be done on both male and female submissives. In this game, the Dominant is the evil doctor, and the submissive is his/her helpless patient. The doctor (who for effect can be wearing rubber gloves, and if you have cash, a cheap doctor's costume) has the subject tied to his examining table, and can perform all manner of experiments on them. The Dom/me could probe the sub in various places using any one of a number of suitable laboratory instruments (this is where you break out the sex toys). Perhaps S/He might put clothespins on their nipples, to see how they respond to compression. Maybe they'll want to experiment to see how long the sub can be stimulated without being allowed to climax. The dirty doc could keep his/her sub there through the long hours of the night, conducting endless experiments to find out how many times s/he can climax, or how large a probe s/he can accept, or how deeply s/he can be penetrated, ho hard he can get, how wet she can get... you can note your results in their medical "chart" (I use a clipboard, a plain old notebook is fine too) and save it. When you play again, it's fun to see the results change!
Write on the body
This can be fun as it adds a little sense of degradation to your playtime. You can write dirty words (such as writing "slut" or "fucktoy" across your partner's chest), or write short descriptions of what you plan to do to your partner just before you do it. You can take this a step further; go out to eat, send your partner into the restroom with a marker and tell your partner to strip, write dirty words on his or her own body, masturbate to orgasm, and come back out. Or in the morning, you can write things like "property of (your name)", "slut", "owned" on the submissive's chest, then send him or her to work that way.
Welcome Home
This is a great start to sexy evening, and practice D/s at the same time. When the submissive is away, perhaps at work or at the store, take a brown paper bag and place a set of restraints (wrist cuffs, or the like), or a blindfold, or both, in it. Maybe a certain piece of lingerie that you want them to wear would be fun too. Set the paper bag near the bedroom door (or on the porch, inside the front door, anywhere it will definitely be seen!), and tape a sheet of paper with instructions on it on the door. The sheet should instruct the submissive to strip completely, open the bag, and put on the restraints/cuffs/blindfold, or to dress in the outfit, before opening the door. The submissive is not allowed through the door until he or she is properly prepared. The anticipation heightens arousal, as well as practicing the Dom/sub mindset of control and following orders.
Sensation play
You probably use sensation play in your regular sexual activities and don't even realize it. How many times have you had her leave her stockings on, simply because you love the way they feel? Or stroked his cock with your silky panties?
You can use sensation play in D/s scenes too! Start by blindfolding your partner (and tying him or her down, if you like), then subjecting him or her to a wide variety of different sensations. For example, you may stroke your lover's body with ice, or drip hot wax on his or her body, or caress your lover's skin with soft fur, silk scarves, felt, feathers, coarse sandpaper (but gently!), anything with texture.
Human Sex Doll
This is a good way to explore your partner and dabble in D/s. The idea is simple: the submissive partner is a living sex toy, and allows the dominant to put him or her into any position and do anything they want. The submissive partner simply remains in whatever position the dominant places him or her into, and does not take an active role as the dominant explores the submissive. Pay attention to the reactions as you explore. This is a great way to really learn your partner's body and see what makes them tick.
A similar scenario to this is :
The Prize
In this scenario, the submissive is a dancer at an "anything goes" nightclub. As a special promotion, the club has sponsored a drawing; the winner of the drawing gets full and complete use of the stripper for an evening, and the stripper must allow the winner to do whatever he or she wants. The winner takes full advantage of the prize, using the stripper as a sex toy; the stripper must be completely obedient and allow the winner to do whatever the winner wishes, regardless of how the stripper feels about it.
Choose Your Adventure
This is a fun and devious technique that can make use of any of the other ideas here, and anything else you can think of. Make a list, without showing it to your partner, of questions that can be answered with "yes" or "no" or with multiple choice answers. Then ask your partner to answer each question, without telling your partner what the questions are. For example, you might write down a list of questions such as "Will you be tied down?", "Will you be allowed to reach orgasm?", "Will I penetrate you anally, orally, or vaginally?", "Will you be spanked?", or whatever else strikes your fancy.
Don't let your partner see the list. Ask your partner, "Choose 1, 2, or 3," and "Choose yes or no." Write down your partner's answers, then do to your partner whatever their answers indicate. If your partner complains, you can always say "Hey, this is what you chose!"
Orgasm Denial
This is a fun, and frustrating, technique that can bring some of the spark back into sex. There are a hundred variations, but the basic idea is simple: prevent your partner from having an orgasm for a length of time (a day, two days, a week, whatever you want). You can, for example, require that your partner have sex one or more times a day, or masturbate regularly (maybe roll a pair of dice to see how many times they have to "edge" each day) but your partner is not allowed any sexual release. Over time, the sexual tension builds up, and your partner becomes perpetually aroused.
When done over a period of several days or longer, this technique creates a very powerful level of sexual excitement. When you do finally allow your partner release, it's an extremely intense experience. Some of my subs have described it as "their minds leaving their bodies".
Home Invasion (roleplay for men to use on women)
Call your girl. Tell her you've heard that there are burglars in her neighborhood. They tie these women up, ransack their bedrooms, then have their way with their helpless victims. Talk in a sexy voice... to build anticipation and of course, because you don't want to scare the shit out of her. Wait long enough that she totally expecting it and obviously, you go over to her place wearing a burglar costume: Black shirt, black pants, leather gloves, a mask of some kind. Open the door. Tiptoe around until you find your lady, hopefully dressed to please you. You could play "chloroform" her by holding a handkerchief soaked in cheap cologne lightly over her nose and mouth for a few seconds; Or, she could obligingly faint at the very sight of you. Or you can simply seize her in your strong, manly arms. The result is the same: She gets bound and gagged in her bedroom, where she must sit / lie helplessly while you go through her dresser drawers, take her costume jewelry, rummage in her purse, and generally violate her space. Then you can violate her. After you've taken everything of value, you leave her tied up and go. (NOTE! Do NOT go out any doors that lock, period! Do NOT leave the house!!! ) Wait a few minutes. Put on a different shirt, and take off the mask. Then go back into the bedroom with "OMG! What happened!!" Untie her, take her in your arms, comfort her an any way she may desire. See how many fun ways she can show her gratitude for being rescued.
DON'T FORGET YOUR SAFE WORDS!
Dirty Doctor (roleplay)
This is a favorite of mine that can be done on both male and female submissives. In this game, the Dominant is the evil doctor, and the submissive is his/her helpless patient. The doctor (who for effect can be wearing rubber gloves, and if you have cash, a cheap doctor's costume) has the subject tied to his examining table, and can perform all manner of experiments on them. The Dom/me could probe the sub in various places using any one of a number of suitable laboratory instruments (this is where you break out the sex toys). Perhaps S/He might put clothespins on their nipples, to see how they respond to compression. Maybe they'll want to experiment to see how long the sub can be stimulated without being allowed to climax. The dirty doc could keep his/her sub there through the long hours of the night, conducting endless experiments to find out how many times s/he can climax, or how large a probe s/he can accept, or how deeply s/he can be penetrated, ho hard he can get, how wet she can get... you can note your results in their medical "chart" (I use a clipboard, a plain old notebook is fine too) and save it. When you play again, it's fun to see the results change!
Write on the body
This can be fun as it adds a little sense of degradation to your playtime. You can write dirty words (such as writing "slut" or "fucktoy" across your partner's chest), or write short descriptions of what you plan to do to your partner just before you do it. You can take this a step further; go out to eat, send your partner into the restroom with a marker and tell your partner to strip, write dirty words on his or her own body, masturbate to orgasm, and come back out. Or in the morning, you can write things like "property of (your name)", "slut", "owned" on the submissive's chest, then send him or her to work that way.
Welcome Home
This is a great start to sexy evening, and practice D/s at the same time. When the submissive is away, perhaps at work or at the store, take a brown paper bag and place a set of restraints (wrist cuffs, or the like), or a blindfold, or both, in it. Maybe a certain piece of lingerie that you want them to wear would be fun too. Set the paper bag near the bedroom door (or on the porch, inside the front door, anywhere it will definitely be seen!), and tape a sheet of paper with instructions on it on the door. The sheet should instruct the submissive to strip completely, open the bag, and put on the restraints/cuffs/blindfold, or to dress in the outfit, before opening the door. The submissive is not allowed through the door until he or she is properly prepared. The anticipation heightens arousal, as well as practicing the Dom/sub mindset of control and following orders.
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